Above is a picture of a parking spot in downtown St. Paul. Specifically, it’s the one on the northeast corner of St. Peter and 5th. Feel free to park your car here and enjoy some of the many businesses and attractions downtown. Just make sure you follow these simple rules:
You can park in this spot for up to an hour between 8:00 a.m. and 4:30 p.m., as long as you pay the meter; if you park here after 4:30 p.m., it’s free. But, wait: don’t park here at all Monday through Friday between the hours of 7:00 a.m. to 9:00 a.m. and 4:00 p.m. to 6:00 p.m. (regardless of whether you paid the meter). Also, don’t leave your car here between the hours of 2:00 a.m. and 7:00 a.m. unless it’s a Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday or Sunday, in which case it’s allowed. Parking meters are strictly enforced, by the way, and failure to obey any one of these rules will result in a $33 fine.
Got all that? Good. Enjoy your time in St. Paul.
Okay, I know the world has bigger problems, but seriously, this is ridiculous. Look, I only got a “C” in my freshman Intro to Logic course in college, so I’m probably just not cut out to tackle St. Paul’s labyrinthine parking restrictions, and I should just resign myself to getting ticketed every few months when I stumble upon some weird parking spot with insane rules. On the other hand, I don’t think a doctorate in philosophy should be a prerequisite to be able to figure out where you can safely park your car — especially in a city that’s half-deserted most of the time.
Thankfully, St. Paul’s business community agrees with me. The local district council is even doing a survey to let people voice their concerns. Please, do me and the rest of the city a favor and tell them all of your parking horror stories. It appears somebody may actually be on the verge of doing something about this situation. In the meantime, I’m going to go fight my second parking ticket in a year…


